Your almost daily source for moral understanding. Helping you understand the pains-taking thought process inside liberal shortcomings. Feel free to leave your comments, but we can't promise to give a shit about them.Happy Inauguration Day, Liberal Jerkoffs! and Thanks for being a rash on the balls of America!
This day is ours. It is not yours silly liberals, although if you had the capacity for logic, it would be. I dedicated this day to doing all the things liberals are trying to stop me from doing. The next four years may be the last chance to do a lot of the things I take for granted. I'll take you through it:
I woke up, and before I even went to take my morning piss, I went outside and brushed all the snow off my grill. That's right, I treated myself to a 1.5 pound steak for breakfast. As it turns out, I woke up my liberal neighbors when I did this, since it was 5 AM and I go to work everyday. On my way to work in my evil conservative gas-guzzling SUV hatemobile, I filled my tank with the high test. I decided to take the long way to work after that, without wearing my seatbelt, hoping to pollute as much of the fucking atmosphere as possible. I even left 'er running while I was at work. On the way home, I stopped off at the biggest corperation I could, Wal-Mart, and bought a case of shells for my shotgun. No, I don't have any real need for ammunition today, but if any liberals try to take away my rights today, I just might.
Let's all take a moment to appreciate what happened today at noon. Just imagine if Kerry had won the election. We'd be fucked. It would be like asking Billy Joel to be your kids' school bus driver. Just plain stupid. And for those of you pretending not to know what I mean:
Living in this country is sort of like quarterbacking a football team. You have a choice between two guys to snap the ball to you and protect your ass. You can either have the guy from "Everybody Loves Raymond" (the one whose wife and mom bosses him around), or Vin Diesil. Thank god America picked the right one.
"Even I would make a better leader than Kerry!"
posted by Jesse @ 2:18 PM
3 comments
Liberals are Fucking NUTS
3 Comments:
I was watching from germany and it was brilliant.
You are lucky to have him as your President!
Hell Yeah! When I came across your blog I thought I was reading my own. I think your writing is better though, but all I can do is try ;)
Check mine out sometime
http://smashingzero.blogspot.com
Personally, I enjoy being a rash on "America's Balls."
No one is telling you that you have to buy crappy products at Wal-Mart. You can waste your money on low-quality products if you want to. You can take away from American manufacturing countries (the few that are left) by purchasing products from foreign countries. I am guilty of this myself, but I always check to see where my products were manufactured. If you want to contribute to sexism in the workforce, shot at Wal-Mart. If you feel that it is your conservative duty to give money to a corporation that gives employees poor benefits and poor wages, shop at Wal-Mart. If you want to buy products that were made by kids in horrible working conditions in foreign countries, shop at Wal-Mart.
If you want to pollute the air and hand a crappy environment to your kids, and give them barely potable drinking water and filthy air, pollute some more. Also, your children will be paying for it.
No one is telling you to wear a seat belt. But it is the law, and I thought that most conservatives were law-biding citizens. But, if you get pulled over for not wearing that seatbelt, don't come a bitchin' when you have to pay a traffic ticket for breaking the law.
See I would like to do some things before Bush starts his second term: Say what I want, where I want, when I want, to who I want. I want to be able to call my friends on the phone and talk about Islam and the War on Terror. I want to check out books at my local library that are strictly on coups that were aided by the United States, and books on nuclear weapons, books about the Middle East, and criticize the President before all of that becomes obsolete in our emerging police state.
I want to protest, and excercise my right of assembly before all protestors are shot dead in the streets due to wide spread dissent and disapproval regarding Bush's policies.
I want to smell the winter air, and look at the beautiful American landscapes, particularly forest and lake oriented before they are single handedly destroyed. I want to visit Alaska before it is tore to shreds, and littered with dead animal carcasses and I want to meet with Alaskian people before they are driven out of their homes and slammed into poverty.
I want to eat fish, without getting mercury poisioning. I want to travel the world before every American is unwanted in foreign countries. I want to see the Eiffel Tower, I want to read a book in the Red Square, and eat in an authentic North Korean Restaurant in North Korea before we are despised. I want to see new places and engage in new experiences while I still can without feeling threatened and feeling as if my life is endangered.
I want to have the option to have an abortion if nessacary.
In other words, I want to be an American.
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